Showing posts with label NFL. Show all posts
Showing posts with label NFL. Show all posts

Sunday, January 3, 2010

NFL Week 17, aka The Second Preseason


Any gambler who bets the NFL in Week 17 is a fool. It's so much like betting the preseason: So many teams are resting starters for the playoffs and so many others are playing the young backups to see what they've got for 2010, that the team playing resembles little of the team that played in the same laundry the previous 16 weeks. There's no way to tell how any game is going to go in Week 17.

And the NFL wants to lengthen the regular season by two games. Great, so top seeds can clinch earlier and play 1-2 more throwaway games, while bad teams can play a couple more meaningless games and pile up a couple more losses. Let's learn from the NHL, NBA and MLB: Sure, the longer the season is, the more likely the best teams rise above the lesser teams... but the sooner before the end of the season the bad teams fall out and the more meaningless games that get played.

What they ought to do is add four more wildcards and eliminate the 1st round bye. Roger Goodell will like that because it means more $$$$$$, and address that whole "#1 seeds quitting on late season games" problem.

Adding two more playoff spots in each Conference gives more 8-7 and 7-8 teams something to play for in Week 17, as well as force those top seeds to stay sharp and not camp regulars on the bench for half the game in the last 2 games, since they'll have to play on the opening playoff weekend like everyone else (even if it is against some beatable 8-8 scrub team) instead of getting that week off as they do now.

Sure, you can argue there may be more incentive for top teams to camp the starters since they won't have that rest during Wildcard weekend. But there's just as much of an argument that the starters will need to maintain their chops because they'll have a do-or-die game in one week... and that'll be harder to do if they sleepwalk through a half and then take a seat, or sit for the game entirely. Many teams will opt to play their guys instead of risking rust with a benching.

Honestly, if I had it my way I'd eliminate the wildcards and only let the eight division champs make the playoffs... but the NFL would never do that because they'd lose four cash cows ERRRRRR wildcard games, and granted it would lead to more meaningless late season games since fewer teams would be in the hunt. So I can accept that the current playoff format either needs to stay or expand.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

NFL Photos for Week 6

"YOU KEEP COMING OVER HERE FOR NO REASON AND FLIPPING ME CRAP WHEN HIS TEAM HAS BEEN CHOP BLOCKING AND HOLDING US ALL DAY AND YOU HAVEN'T THROWN A SINGLE FLAG FOR IT"
"No really your fly's open"


It's SUPER OCHOCINCO


Tony Scheffler's kinetic touchdown catching skills proved vital against the Chargers


This week in NFL Interpretative Dance: The vintage 1960 Denver Broncos Tribal Pwnage Dance


Malcolm Floyd does the Space Crabwalk breakdance into the end zone


Tony Gonzalez loses his mind and tries to javelin a goalpost through his opponent


Danieal Manning is about to execute a sweet header towards the Falcons' goal, and receive a stern reminder that no, Danieal, we aren't playing soccer, soccer players don't wear these uniforms


"Hold on a sec, throw it WHERE?"


As Dawan Landry is about to find out in nauseating fashion, whatever Adrian Peterson had for breakfast causes horrible gas


Matt Cassel makes an ill advised decision to participate in the Running of the Bullcrappers, and gets gored


"Wait, is this the right guy? Think, Brodney, think!"


"GIVE ME BACK MY UGLY ORANGE JERSEY"
"NO DUDE THIS IS *MY* UGLY ORANG- HEY!"


The NFL's experimental floating bumbleball produced entertaining but unwelcome results


"Free halftime pizza and beer goes to... THE JAGUARS COACHING STAFF"


"THAT'S THE THIRD STRAIGHT WEEK THE JAGS COACHES HAVE WON. I CALL SHENANIGANS."


"Don't we need a table to arm wrestle?"
"Naw, we're cool. On three. One. Two...."


"GET... YOUR HEAD... OFF... OF MY ARM"


"BOO"
"AAAAGH!"


Donald Driver realizes in sudden horror that Demarcus Figgins is about to volleyball spike that football off his face


"Hold on a sec, I'll be right back"
"Okay... HEY WAIT A MINUTE"


"YES MY PRECIOUS YESSSSSSSSSSSS"
"uhhhhhhhhh somebody please help meeeee"


"GUESS WHO GETS A STARFISH BUMP?"
"Please stop"


"Guys, are we forgetting something?"


"THASS RIGHT WHITE BOY, SPIN KICK POWER"


"No really, Mr Jackson, we need that football for... uh... research purposes"
"NO IT'S MINE"


The Eagles new defense-puppets paid off against the Raiders


"Excuse me that's mine thanks"


The Steelers' new strategy of catapulting their ballcarriers onto the defense had mixed results


"Oh crap what am I supposed to do again?"
"Psst... supposed to drop it"
"Ah cool thanks"


Tuesday, October 13, 2009

NFL Photos for Week 5

INVISIBLE RECLINER


"Ah crap the cops found me"


"Yoyoyo Ochicinco Imma let you finish this catch, but Mark Clayton is the best receiver in football. IN FOOTBALL."


Craig Dahl tries using the Chris Benoit flying headbutt to break up a pass


"Naw your pants look fine. You sure this is a good time to check?"


The Bucs Breakdancing Cover 2 defense fails miserably on this Eagles touchdown


Five bucks says I can stop your QB dead with a girl slap. WATCH.


Living proof the Cowboys are a bunch of ankle biters


This week in NFL Interpretative Dance: Fosse! The New Bucs Defensive Coordinator!


INVISIBLE TALENT


Justin Hartwig: Human Banana Peel


Bobbie Williams celebrates after apparently eating some of his teammates

Speaking of which...

"THAT GUY. THAT GUY ATE MY LUNCH. AGAIN."


The NFL's experimental midfield baby oil slick proves a massive failure


Sorry, Rams, Brett's not giving autographs


It took a few frightening moments to convince Anthony Herrera that Adrian Peterson was celebrating a touchdown, not choking on a meal.

Adrian was advised to work on his touchdown celebrations.

Joe Flacco was surprised to find success throwing like a girl in the Ravens' 17-14 win over the Bengals


They still haven't learned. "HOLD HIM DOWN, MAN. THESE JERSEYS SELL FOR MAD MONEY ON EBAY"


The state of Texas celebrated their recent annexation of Kansas City


The Titans' defensive problems became quickly evident in their deep zone "Let's wait and see if he actually catches it" coverage


"WHY AM I DRESSED LIKE STEVE GROGAN? GET ME OUT OF THIS CRAPPY UNIFORM"


Tom Brady may have had a point, as the old unis stayed on and his Patriots promptly went out and lost to the 1971 Washington Huskies


BIGGEST TOUCHDOWN SPIKE EVER FORTHCOMING


Ahmard Hall goes Bruce Lee to get out of a dogpile against Indy


Finally, there are a couple of obvious photos from Week 5 but Kissing Suzy Kolber beat me to it with caps of their own (this one is not nice and NSFW) that made me laugh enough that I can't try to top them. Well played, Unsilent Majority.

(Crossposted as always to my personal blog)